Where Can I Go?

I had a moment this morning where I finally understood a verse that wasn't clear to me for awhile now.
It's from Psalm 139:

Where can I go from Your Spirit?

Or where can I flee from Your presence?

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If I ascend into heaven, You are there;

If I make my bed in hell, behold, You are there.

And then I realized, in my past there were a couple years in there that were absolute hell on earth for me. And worst of all, many parts of my hell I had created for myself. I had made my bed in hell. 

And in the moment I definitely didn't feel like God was there with me. But now looking back I can see specific moments and happenings that show me God was definitely there and definitely protecting me from much more destruction that I would have inflicted on myself. 

I've been to my own hell, God was there.

I'm now pursuing Him right back, and God is here.

One day, I'll get to ascend into heaven, and God will be there; 

waiting for me with open arms.